4 Considerations Before Piling More onto Your Schedule
Finding balance, setting limits, and learning to pass on an opportunity is not an easy task. No one wants to miss out; in fact, many of us suffer from “FOMO.” Further, saying no to someone you love isn’t always easy and telling your boss that you need to scale-back on any additional time spent at the office is almost unheard of in the workplace.
Because saying no can be difficult and unsettling, many people find themselves taking on more than they should. As a result, many Americans experience high levels of stress. Stress has both serious and negative health implications. It has been linked to numerous physical and emotional disorders including, anxiety, depression, stroke, heart attacks, immune system disturbances, and hypertension.
So how do you know if you are taking on too much? How do you know if you are at max capacity?
Here are 4 considerations before you pile more onto your schedule...
1) Are you listening to your inner voice?
Before you say yes to an offer, opportunity, or long-term commitment, make sure you are checking-in with yourself. Are you biting off more than you can chew? Does the thought of saying yes overwhelm you? Or does the idea of taking on an additional task energize or excite you?
Often times, people feel stuck, depleted, or stressed when they have too many commitments. It is important to know your limits and make space for your inner voice. If you feel as if you should say no, give yourself permission to politely decline. Chances are, your inner voice just needs to feel validated and heard. Trust me, the world will keep turning and your future self will thank you.
2) Do you have enough time to engage in the activities you enjoy?
If your answer is no, think twice before you commit to something. Although it can be difficult to decline an invitation or to (potentially) shut the door on an opportunity (e.g. for fear of disappointing others or for fear of missing out), it is sometimes necessary.
If you aren’t engaging in enough self-care, or if you find it challenging to manage and uphold your current commitments, you may want to reconsider adding one more thing to your agenda.
Remember, we can’t say yes to everything. If people are unhappy with your response, it is on THEM to find a way to manage their disappointment (no need to justify your decision or explain your position). Be kind, direct, and gracious- most people will understand.
3) Is there something getting in the way of you saying no?
I get it. Saying no can be difficult (especially if you’ve noticed that you tend to people-please). We all have emotional blocks and things that get in the way of us turning down an offer from time-to-time.
If you feel as if you have a block, try processing that barrier with a friend. The sooner that you can identify it, understand it, and own it, the better off you will be.
4) Are you saying yes for the right reasons?
If you were to accept an offer or commit to working on an additional project, would you feel at peace with your decision? I realize that this is a tough question for many to answer because, as adults, we often have to do things that we don’t want to do. But for the tasks that you do not need to fulfill- for the things that you can pass on if you wish to- do you really need to say yes? Think about this for a minute.
If saying yes will ultimately cause you discomfort, resentment, or will complicate your life, lean into the part of you that is wanting to set limits. On the flip-side, if accepting an invitation seems like it would be a fulfilling or rewarding experience, feel free to say yes.
So, what are the lessons here?
- Know your limits, slow-down, strive for balance, and don’t be afraid to say no.
- Saying no is OK. In fact, it is often healthy and empowering.
- Everyone likes a “yes (wo)man,” except for the person in the mirror. Learn to take care of you- and learn to advocate for you.
- If you have a barrier or block- name it, tame it, and start to claim it.
- No one else is aware of your limits, so it is your mission (and your mission alone) to tell people when you can’t possibly do something.
If you’re still struggling to say no or if you tend to say yes more than you should, I would love to support you in finding balance and solutions. Request a FREE discovery call with me today and let’s do this together- one step at a time.
“Once she stopped rushing through life, she was amazed how much more life she had time for.” -unknown