EMDR & Relational EMDR Therapy® in San Diego

What is EMDR?

Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) is an evidence-based psychotherapy that helps people heal from trauma and distressing life experiences. When an experience is too overwhelming to fully process at the time, aspects of it can remain unintegrated—continuing to show up through anxiety, emotional reactivity, negative beliefs, relationship patterns, or a sense that something from the past still feels very present.

EMDR helps the brain reprocess these experiences so they can be integrated in a more adaptive, less distressing way. During EMDR, we use bilateral stimulation, such as eye movements or tapping, while briefly focusing on aspects of a memory. As processing occurs, the emotional intensity of the experience can decrease and beliefs such as “I’m not safe” or “I’m not enough” can begin to shift toward perspectives that feel more grounded and connected to who you are now.

EMDR is widely researched and used in the treatment of PTSD and trauma, including single-incident and more complex or developmental experiences. It can also be used to work with anxiety, panic, depression, attachment wounds, and experiences that continue to shape how you see yourself and relate to others.

I am an EMDRIA Certified Therapist™ and EMDRIA Approved Consultant-in-Training™, and serve as faculty with the Center for Excellence in EMDR Therapy. My work reflects advanced training, ongoing consultation, and extensive clinical experience using EMDR as a comprehensive psychotherapy approach.

What Happens During EMDR?

EMDR is collaborative, and you remain in control throughout the process. Together, we identify the experiences, beliefs, emotions, and body sensations connected to what you want to work on. You don’t need to tell every detail of a memory, and you can pause or stop at any time.

As processing unfolds, you may notice shifts in emotions, sensations, images, beliefs, or the meaning you make of an experience. We may work with past experiences, present-day triggers, and what you need to feel more prepared for situations in the future.

The goal isn’t to erase a memory or convince yourself that something painful didn’t matter. It’s for the past to feel like the past — something you can remember without having to experience it in the same way.

Adaptive Information Processing

EMDR is grounded in the Adaptive Information Processing (AIP) model, developed by Dr. Francine Shapiro. AIP proposes that the brain naturally works to integrate experiences into existing memory networks, allowing us to learn from what happens and move forward.

When an experience is overwhelming, that process can be disrupted. Memories may remain connected to the emotions, sensations, and beliefs that were present at the time, which can cause something from the past to feel surprisingly current when triggered in the present.

EMDR helps those experiences become more fully integrated, so the past can inform you without continuing to organize how you feel and respond today.

What is Relational EMDR Therapy® (R-EMDR)?

R-EMDR was developed by Deany Laliotis through decades of clinical practice, teaching, facilitation, and consultation. Her work expands upon traditional EMDR by integrating deeper emotional attunement and emphasizing the central role of the therapeutic relationship in the healing process.

Relational EMDR (R-EMDR) places a greater emphasis on the therapeutic relationship and the role of attachment in healing. This approach is especially helpful for individuals navigating developmental trauma, relational wounds, and long-standing emotional patterns.

In R-EMDR, the work focuses not only on past experiences, but also on what unfolds in the present moment between therapist and client. Within a safe, attuned, and collaborative space, clients are supported in reprocessing trauma, strengthening emotional regulation, and developing a more secure and connected sense of self.

What Does a Relational EMDR Therapist Bring to the Work?

“R-EMDR integrates the power of trauma reprocessing with deep attunement to attachment, nervous system regulation, and the therapeutic relationship itself. Rather than relying solely on protocol, the work is tailored to the client’s emotional experience in real time. This can create a safer, more nuanced, and often more transformative healing process, particularly for complex or developmental trauma.”

A Relational EMDR therapist brings more than the EMDR protocol itself. Alongside reprocessing traumatic experiences and reducing distress, there is close attention to attachment, safety, pacing, emotional attunement, and what is happening between therapist and client in real time.

The therapist is tracking both the memory being processed and the person processing it—paying attention to nervous system cues, protective responses, overwhelm, and the relational experiences that have shaped how you see yourself and others. The work is individualized rather than technique-driven, with the therapeutic relationship becoming an active part of the healing process.

You’re not simply being guided through a protocol. You’re being accompanied through an experience.

What Can a Relational EMDR Help With?

Complex trauma
Attachment
Childhood/developmental trauma
Self-esteem/Self-worth
Relational trauma
Emotional regulation
Shame and identity wounds
Clients who felt unseen, rushed, or destabilized in previous EMDR experiences

What Can EMDR & R-EMDR Help With?

EMDR and Relational EMDR Therapy® (R-EMDR) can be used to work with a wide range of experiences, symptoms, and patterns, including:

Trauma, PTSD, and distressing life experiences
Anxiety, panic, fears, and phobias
Attachment wounds and relational injuries
Depression and persistent negative beliefs about yourself
Grief, loss, and major life transitions
Low self-worth, shame, and feelings of powerlessness
Chronic illness, pain, and medical experiences
Sexual assault and other experiences of violation
Stress, emotional overwhelm, and sleep disturbance

EMDR can help lessen the emotional intensity of past experiences, shift beliefs that no longer fit, and create more flexibility in how you experience yourself, your relationships, and the present.

Rather than just managing symptoms, this work supports deeper healing; so you can move through life with more clarity, resilience, and a stronger sense of self.

Wondering if EMDR or R-EMDR Might Be a Good Fit?

If something from the past still carries more weight than you’d like, or you’re noticing reactions, beliefs, or patterns that don’t seem to shift just by understanding them, EMDR may offer a different way of working. Connect with me to talk about what’s bringing you in and what you’d like to feel different.

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